Many Kinds of Relationships
This subject of relationships is a broad one, and this article cannot do justice to it all. I do, however, wish to carefully focus our attention upon one particular type of association that is profoundly important to God. Before we delve into this issue, let's get a quick overview of the other major kinds of relationships that are revealed in the Scriptures.
1) Father - Son. This is probably the most easily recognizable and primary spiritual relationship that exists between a believer and God. When the Savior walked this earth, he constantly talked about God as his Father. In many instances, this startled and even angered the Jews of his day. On one particular occasion, we see their negative reaction displayed most forcefully. Notice the account in John 5:
"Jesus (Yahshua) answered them, My Father works hitherto and I work. Therefore the Jews sought the more to kill him, because he not only had broken the Sabbath (so they thought), but said also, that God was his Father, making himself equal with God" (John 5:17-18).
Jesus not only revealed that Yahweh was his true heavenly Father, but he also taught the disciples that they too should look upon God as their own spiritual Father. In Matthew 5:48, he said:
"Become you therefore perfect, even as YOUR FATHER in heaven is perfect." (Matthew 5:48)
The passages of Scripture dealing with this very important relationship are far too numerous to even list, much less quote. We shall let the apostle Paul have the last word on this particular affiliation between man and God. In his classic letter to the Romans, he makes one of the most straightforward statements concerning this matter:
"For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are THE SONS OF GOD, For you have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but you have received the Spirit of adoption, by which we cry, ABBA, FATHER" (Romans 8:14-15).
2) Master - Servant. This special relationship between God and man is evident from the very earliest times. In fact, any human being who is called and chosen by God automatically becomes His servant. This role has been played by the likes of everyone from righteous Abel and Enoch and Noah, before the great Flood; to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob; to Moses, Joshua and David; to the prophets, the apostles, even to Christ Himself. In John 13, the Messiah told the disciples:
"You call me MASTER, and Lord: and you say well, for so I am" (John 13:13).
Every single one of God's people, whether in ancient times or in our up-to-date 20th century, have all been called to serve. This is indeed the bottom line of true Christianity.
3) Husband - Wife. We often think only of Christ and the New Testament Church when we consider the relationship of Husband to wife; but, in tact, it existed long ago as well. Let's not forget that Yahweh was once married to ancient Israel. But that's not all. He has promised to marry her again in the future. Hosea prophesied of that time by saying:
"Therefore, behold, I will allure her, and bring her into the wilderness, and speak comfortably to her (to her heart). And I will give her her vineyards from thence, and the valley of Achor for a door of hope: and she shall sing there, as in the days of her youth, and as in the day when she came from the land of Egypt. And it shall be at that day, saith the Lord, that you shall call me ISHI (My Husband!)" (Hosea 2:14-16).
Of course, it virtually goes without saying that Christians are also pictured in a certain type of marital relationship with Christ. Paul makes this quite clear in his second letter to the Corinthians:
"For I am jealous over you with Godly jealousy: for I have espoused you to one husband, that I may present you as a chaste virgin to Christ" (2 Corinthians 11:2).
Paul expounds on this theme much more extensively in Ephesians 5, showing how the love and care and responsibilities that exist between a physical husband and wife also have spiritual fulfillment in the relationship between Christ and the Church.
4) Body of Christ. Here is another very unique bond, both between the Savior and the Church, as well as among the believers themselves. Once again, it is the apostle Paul who treats this subject in several of his letters, most notably that of 1 Corinthians . Writing in the 12th chapter of this book, he states:
"For as the body is one and has many members, and all the members of that one body, being many, are one body: so also is Christ. For the body is not one member, but many ... And the eye cannot say to the hand, I have no need of you; nor again the head to the feet, I have no need of you ... the members should have the same care one for another ... Now you are the BODY OF CHRIST, and members in particular" (1Corinthians 12:12-27).
This association demonstrates the kind of care and service the various members of the Church are to have toward each other, while at the same time being subject to the Head of the Body -- Jesus Christ.
5) Brothers and Sisters. This relationship is easy to understand, if we believe that we are begotten children of the Father. In other words, if the Father-son relationship is present, it naturally follows that the offspring of God would then be brothers and sisters of the same divine Family. This, of course, is why we often read in many parts of the New Testament of how the members addressed each other as "brother" or "sister." As we know, the apostles usually saluted the members collectively as "brethren." Anyone who has been in the Church for very long has surely come to understand and appreciate this very marvelous connection one with another.
Scripture reveals, however, yet another relationship--one that is woven through all these other associations--one, in fact, that ties everything together. It is the most intimate relationship that God desires between Himself and His people; and, because of this, it is perhaps the most difficult of all relationships for us to truly believe and experience.
In spite of the fact that all of these foregoing links and bonds are certainly in force and effect, we still have a desperate need for this other unique relationship. Even though the relationship of Master to servant, Husband to wife, brother to sister, even Father to son, are all of immense significance, without this special relationship, something is still missing.
The Friend of God
We are all, by nature, essentially alone - existentially alone. The door to our personal home is closed shut and latched. God the Father and Christ want to change this situation. Notice how Jesus put it in Revelation 3:20:
"Behold, I stand at the door, and knock. If any man shall HEAR my voice, and OPEN the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me."
Please consider what Christ is conveying in this passage of Scripture. He is describing a certain, special relationship that he desires with each of God's children. That relationship is not the Father-son association nor that of Master-servant nor of Husband-wife. This particular bond is different. Your Savior says that what he would really like is to have you recognize his voice, open the door and invite him to come in -- sit down, relax, and enjoy a meal -- indeed, a feast together -- just you and him. This relationship, brethren, is much more profound than any other possible affiliation.
This type of relationship is also expressed by Christ in an earlier instance. After the last supper, one of the apostles asked him a question. His response is very telling:
"Judas, not Iscariot, said to him, Lord, how is it that you will manifest yourself to us, and not to the world? Jesus answered and said to him, If a man loves me, he will keep my words: and my Father will love him, and we will COME TO HIM. and MAKE OUR ABODE WITH HIM" (John 14:22-23).
In these two passages, Christ makes very plain the fact that both he and the Father desire a very special type of relationship with true believers. When one is alone, as we all really are, that person needs something -- indeed, someone. In fact, he desperately needs precisely what God wants to provide for him. He needs, above all else, A FRIEND!!,
Brethren, the truth is that our very effectiveness as the children of Yahweh is directly proportional to our INTIMACY with our heavenly Father and his Son, Jesus Christ (Yahshua). When God inspired the prophet Isaiah to write those famous, oft-quoted words: "Come now, let us reason together" (Isaiah 1:18), He was essentially extending an open invitation to each of us to get to know Him, not just as our Father or Creator or Master, but as our friend.
Those individuals who throughout history have been the most effective in interceding with God have been HIS FRIENDS -- not those who have been merely casually acquainted with Him. Perhaps the most prominent example of this type of person is to be seen in the great patriarch Abraham. In at least three different places in Scripture, we read something very special about the relationship between Yahweh and Abraham. First, Isaiah writes:
"But you, Israel, are my servant, Jacob whom I have chosen, the seed of Abraham MY FRIEND" (Isaiah 41:8).
The apostle James also comments on this unique association by saying:
"And the scripture was fulfilled which says, Abraham believed God, and it was imputed to him for righteousness: and he was called the FRIEND OF GOD" (James 2:23)
I know that we all have read these verses before, perhaps many times in the past; but I have to wonder just how real they truly are to us. The Bible states categorically that Abraham was not just a son of God or a servant of God, but a friend of God. Now the relationship of Father to son is admittedly very special. That of Master to servant certainly expresses an appropriate aspect of our affiliation with God. But a friend, indeed the closest and best of friends -- well, that is an entirely different matter -- one that I am afraid we tend to either overlook or simply view in the abstract.
The idea that God and man (read: God and you would be considered friends will strike many as just a little difficult to accept, just a little hard to truly visualize, maybe even bizarre! Such a relationship seems impossible -- too human -- too casual. Oh, we can easily relate to it on our own level. After all, we all hopefully have friends, and a few of those friends have perhaps become our best friends. In fact, when it comes down to the human frame, most of us could hardly imagine life without friends; or, at least, a friend.
The fact, however, that we desire, cultivate and enjoy friendships is clear evidence that the God who created us in His own image also wants the very same thing. This may sound astounding to some, but it should not. All of the good qualities, proclivities, even desires, of mankind find their ultimate fulfillment in God Himself. Man has emotions (joy, sadness, anger, etc.), because Yahweh has those same feelings. Man can manipulate mathematical formulae and calculate huge numbers and invent or design incredible creations, because God's mind is, first and foremost, able and intelligent enough to do these things and far more, of course. Well, the very same principle applies in the case of friendship between God and man.
Our Savior emphasized to his disciples that his relationship with them (and certainly with us as well, if indeed we are his disciples!) was based primarily on friendship, not merely on a Master-servant association. Notice John 15:14-16:
"You are my friends, if you do whatever I command you. Henceforth I call you not servants (slaves); for the servant knows not what his lord does: but I have called you FRIENDS; for all things that I have heard from my Father, I have made known to you. You have not chosen me, but I have chosen you."
These are surely some of the most inspiring, encouraging, uplifting and revealing words in all the Scriptures. Jesus Christ (Yahshua ha Meshiach) actually wants to be friends with the likes of you and me-indeed, best friends. This is utterly remarkable. We can relate to the other relationships discussed in the Bible, but best friends is almost beyond our ability and even willingness to fathom and accept. Please, however, I urge you not to feel this way nor to relegate this to the realm of mere abstract concept. And don't try to spiritualize it away. This is REAL! This is the way it is -- the way God Himself truly is!
Attributes of a Friend
If we are to understand and identify with the fact that God wants us to be best friends with Him, we would do well to simply consider some of the characteristics of a true friend. Obviously there are many more than I can list or expound here, but let's take a brief look at seven outstanding traits of best friends. As we cover these points, think about how they apply in the spiritual realm between you and God.
1) Friends Always Stay in Touch. This is really a given, isn't it? It seems that no matter what arises between best friends, they always manage, indeed make a concerted effort, to stay in close contact. Why? There is one overriding reason-they LIKE EACH OTHER!! Life just wouldn't be the same, just wouldn't be as rich and rewarding, without that link between best friends being continually nourished and enhanced. I don't care if companions like these are separated by hundreds, even thousands, of miles; it doesn't matter if such separation lasts over years of time-they are going to make a point of staying in touch-whether by letter, by phone, or by arranged visit. It is almost like one's best friend is really an extension of oneself, and to lose contact with that individual is akin to losing part of you. It is heartbreaking when a best friend drifts away and fails to stay in close communication. It's like something very vital inside you just shriveled up and died.
It is the same way with God as well. Remember, God desires, craves, even needs close friendship. When He created man, He stated that it was not good that the man should be alone. He feels the very same way about Himself. He neither prefers nor chooses to be alone. just like us, God wants close friends -- and the close friends he wants are, believe it or not, you and me! Therefore, as best friends, it is incumbent upon us, indeed it should be our driving purpose, to stay in close contact with each other. The truth of the matter is that God the Father always fulfills His part in this special relationship. He continually seeks to draw closer, to contact and stay in touch with us. His Spirit is constantly working, seeking ways of stimulating our minds, triggering right thoughts, moving us and directing us to discern His will for us, motivating and urging us to make the right decisions and take the right turns in this life and calling.
If you wish to really get a strong hold on genuine friendship with God, you must begin with the DESIRE for that relationship and the willingness to consistently stay in touch with your BEST FRIEND! That means that you must begin to seriously reconsider your status with God - your relationship -- and especially the quality and quantity of your contact with Him.
Our real lack of this kind of friendship with God is so often indicated in the way we pray. In so many instances, we feel uncomfortable in prayer -- stiff, stilted, overly formal, uncertain of what to say or how to say it, worthless, guilt-ridden, small, insignificant. I know these feelings from my own first-hand experience. I have, however, decided to talk to God as my Friend; and therefore, although I always want to be respectful, I strive to speak face to face, man to man, remembering and continually meditating upon this special relationship that exists between me and the Sovereign Ruler of the universe. I urge you to ponder how you really relate to God. On what basis is it? Is He truly your Friend, or is that merely a spiritual-sounding notion to you, and not a living reality? From now on, as you pray, think of the concept of friendship -- indeed, best friends. I am absolutely certain that it will begin to make a very meaningful difference in your spiritual life.
Remember that there was another very famous friend of God -- a man to whom Yahweh revealed Himself in the most personal and powerful way. We read of their relationship in a passage from Exodus 33:11. This is what each of us should desire in our individual situations:
"And it came to pass, as Moses entered into the tabernacle, the cloudy pillar descended, and stood at the door of the tabernacle, and the LORD talked with Moses. And all the people saw the cloudy pillar stand at the door of the tabernacle: and all the people rose and worshipped, every man in his tent-door. And the Lord spoke to Moses, FACE TO FACE, AS A MAN SPEAKS TO HIS FRIEND" (Exodus 33:9-11).
2) Always Forgive. Ideally, best friends should have little need to forgive each other of wrongs committed; but, of course, this is certainly not always the case. Whenever such a situation exists, invariably true friends find it in their hearts to be understanding and forgiving toward one another.
God constantly proves to us that He is our very best friend in this very area. Don't the Scriptures plainly show us His mind, when they state:
"For when we were yet without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly. For scarcely for a righteous man will one die: yet perhaps for a good man some would even dare to die. But God commends His love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. Much more then, being now justified (forgiven and cleared of all wrongdoing) by his blood, we shall be saved from wrath through him. For if when we were enemies, we were reconciled to God by the death of His Son; much more, being reconciled, we shall be saved by his life" (Romans 5:6-10).
This is such strong evidence of just how much God desires to have a close, intimate relationship with man -- strong, in fact, that He was willing to pay the highest price possible -- the life of Yahshua, His only Son. That sacrifice squared the past, exonerated us in spite of who and what we are, and reconciled us to a perfect, sinless Creator God. Christ's death paved the way, broke down the wall of partition, rent the veil, opened the door to allow free access to our Father and Friend in heaven.
Brethren, the forgiveness that God has granted us is inexpressible. Even though we often carry on our shoulders a load of guilt and shame, we must come to terms with the pure fact that God already knew all about who we were and what we would do long before He decided to reconcile us to Himself and make it possible for us to become His friends. And He did it anyway, in spite of the sin and sinful nature of man. When we come under the shed blood of our Savior, that which we have done and that which we are is covered and forgiven and washed away. We must accept this marvelous act of love and compassion on God's part toward us. The apostle Paul put it so well when he told the Romans:
"There is therefore now NO CONDEMNATION to them who are in Christ Jesus, who walk not according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit" (Romans 8:1).
When God forgives, He forgives completely. There are no strings attached to His love and mercy. They are freely given, because of who He is, because of His perfect nature and character. There is no earning of His compassion, no deserving on our part. He does not say that we must become perfect before we can share in His justification, redemption and reconciliation. He offers it without charge -- without charge to us, that is -- but certainly not to Him. The price He willingly paid is incalculable
This sort of freely granted forgiveness is what true friends are able and willing to do for one another. This attitude and approach establishes the basis for real friendship. It opens the door and keeps it open continually.
3) Are Always There When You Need Them. There is an old proverb written by King Solomon that says:
"Perfume and incense bring joy to the heart, and the pleasantness of one's friend springs from his earnest counsel. Do not forsake your friend and the friend of your father ... better is a friend that is near than a brother that is far away" (Proverbs 27:9-10).
Can you think of a Biblical case where, as the saying goes, a friend in need is a friend indeed? How about the time when Paul, upon his first visit to Jerusalem after his conversion, was confronted with a rather stem group of apostles and disciples. Undoubtedly they recalled his former fanaticism in having Christians arrested, beaten, imprisoned and even killed; and consequently they would not welcome him into their midst. Paul would surely feel the sting of rejection many times in his life and service to God, but this time must have been a particularly bitter pill to swallow. Here he was being repudiated by the chosen apostles, the very eyewitnesses of Christ Himself. It was a difficult time for this young man.
Paul, however, was not without a friend. In this case, it was perhaps a future friend, but one who showed from the outset what the nature of a true friend really is. Barnabas, the son of encouragement, came running to his rescue. He was intimate with all the Jerusalem crowd and immediately stepped in and paved the way for Paul. He took him, introduced him to the apostles, and then personally vouched for him. And it made all the difference in the world to a man in Paul's position -- especially to Paul, who had very few, if any, friends at this trying time in his life and ministry, and who was unquestionable plagued with many troubling reminders of his past. But Barnabas put everything aside. Nothing, absolutely nothing, got in the way of his determination to befriend Paul. And even though they later parted company under very adverse circumstances, we know that they remained close friends throughout their lives. Paul speaks affectionately and admirably of Barnabas in some of his later epistles. It is also interesting that Barnabas also befriended John Mark when he too was down. Friends are like that -- they are there when you need them.
Once again, the Proverbs speak to this issue by saying:
"A man who has friends must show himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother" (Proverbs 18:24).
Who could possible overlook one of the most well-known friendships in all the Bible -- that of David and Jonathan. Their relationship was so beautiful -- like the proverb above literally springing to life. Indeed, here were friends who stuck closer than brothers. In fact, that statement is so true. Brothers can often get into quarrels and may be divided forever. Of course, they remain blood kin, but the relationship of best friends is even stronger and more precious than that of siblings. It is said of David and Jonathan THAT THEIR SOULS WERE KNIT TOGETHER (1Samuel 18:1)!
Upon learning of Jonathan's tragic death in the battle of Gilboa, David was inspired to write a eulogy in language that is perhaps unsurpassed in all the Scriptures for its poignancy and emotion:
"David took up this lament concerning Saul and his son Jonathan, and ordered the men of Judah be taught this lament ... Your glory, O Israel, lies slain on your heights. How the mightily have fallen! Tell it not in Gath, proclaim it not in the streets of Ashkelon, lest the daughters of the Philistines be glad, lest the daughters of the uncircumcised rejoice. O mountains of Gilboa, may you have neither dew nor rain, nor fields that yield offerings of grain. For there the shield of the mighty was defiled, the shield of Saul -- no longer rubbed with oil. From the blood of the slain, from the flesh of the mighty, the bow of Jonathan did not turn back, the sword of Saul did not return unsatisfied.
"Saul and Jonathan -- in life they were loved and gracious, and in death they were not parted. They were swifter than eagles, they were stronger than lions. O daughters of Israel, weep for Saul, who clothed you in scarlet and finery, who adorned your garments with ornaments of gold. How the mighty have fallen in battle! Jonathan lies slain on your heights. I grieve for you, Jonathan my brother; you were very dear to me. Your love for me was wonderful, MORE WONDERFUL THAN THAT OF WOMEN. How the mighty have fallen!' " (11Samuel 1:17-27).
You and I have a friend whose love surpasses not only that of women, but even that of Jonathan for David. He fills to the full each and every qualification and aspect of a true best friend. In time of need, He is always, always, always there -- close at hand, not far away. He senses when things are wrong. He knows when trouble is near. In one place He says:
"I am a God that is close at hand ... and not a God far off ... Do I not fill heaven and earth?" (Jeremiah 23:23-24).
Written by: Jim Rector |
